There are many reasons why couples seek professional help or go through relationship therapy. Opposed to what most people believe relationship therapies are not just for mending broken relationships. Some couples go through therapy to strengthen their relationship not because it is falling apart. There are different types of people in different types of relationships; with this relationship, therapy has evolved to cater to different needs. In this article, we will discuss five of the most popular and controversial reasons why couples attend relationship therapy.
Infidelity and Sexual Issues
This might be one of the common issues why couples go through therapy. According to statistics, infidelity is always in the top three reasons for divorce in different countries. It is considered by many as one of the most painful and destructive events in a relationship. Although sexual issues are not the sole reason for infidelity, they are both under the same category as both are considered very sensitive. Some couples try to avoid infidelity by addressing their sexual issues through therapy.
In therapy, embarrassing and hurtful scenarios like infidelity, loss of sex drive or even sexual incompatibility are discussed with utmost care. Since the topics are sensitive some couples find it difficult to fix the problems on their own. With therapy, couples learn to talk about their sexual ideas or comments about their partners without offending each other. They can also learn why a partner has committed infidelity and slowly understand each other’s shortcoming. It’s not a guarantee that a couple can still fix a broken relationship because of infidelity. There could be some relationships that go beyond sexual issues as a reason for infidelity and that would require more work for both parties. In those cases, it is highly advisable to see a recommended relation counsellor for professional help.
Some couples have a hard time communicating not just about sensitive topics but almost everything. For a relationship to work open communication is important. The reason why couples fight daily is usually that of little misunderstandings caused by poor communication. There are several ways people communicate with body language, expressions, conversations and now even through social media.
Relationship therapy teaches couples how to effectively relay their emotions and thoughts to their partners so that they would understand each other. Sometimes, couples also learn to be open-minded to topics they rarely talk about or are uncomfortable with. This will make their relationship stronger as they would know how to empathize and see signs of what their partners are feeling.
People have more than one relationship in their lives. There are romantic, social and family relationships. Couples are usually affected by their other relationships with relatives, friends and even co-workers. These relationships although essential to one’s well-being can cause toxicity to a romantic relationship.
Couples will learn how to prioritize these relationships with the help of therapy. They will also understand how important some relationships are to their partners and would learn to respect the time and effort given to other people. For example, some couples have trouble understanding very close family ties or a certain best friend whom a partner spends a lot of time with. It will show them that support from people outside their relationship is important and would also help them build a more welcoming atmosphere for people from both their side.
There are different types of relationships for couples. One of the best examples is polygamous or polyamorous, same-sex and open relationships. For some people being in multiple relationships is normal, but if their partner is new to the concept or doesn’t really understand how it will work then therapy can definitely help them.
A straight monogamous relationship is already difficult to handle at times. Just imagine having to love and be committed to more than one relationship or be sharing your partner with someone else. In some countries, multiple marriages are legal so it really helps if all parties are aware of what to expect and learn how to make the relationship successful.
These types of therapies may include not just the couple but the other people in the relationship as well. This might be very uncomfortable for some but with the help of good counsellors, they will gradually accept that this is the norm for them now.
Trust and Trauma Issues
We can’t really avoid traumatic experiences in our lives but it really helps to have someone who understands. Some people in relationships have baggage from their past and might find it difficult to trust another person completely. Some say that time would heal all wounds, but it’s not harmful to get a little help.
Therapy can help couples understand each other’s past and learn how to help each other. Dealing with bad experiences can make a person scared of going through the same ordeal. This makes them very careful and walled in thus not giving the relationship their all. Therapy will help them open up and mend each other’s broken past.
A relationship is always worth saving. People pour in their heart, time, money and body into a relationship. Sometimes it takes people a little reminding of why they are in the relationship in the first place. Time can change how people feel about each other but it can always be brought back if both parties are willing to take another chance.
Just like being committed to rehab, therapy will not work if it’s not voluntary. Forcing your partner to go through therapy might just cause more problems. It needs effort from the parties involved and even supports from the people they love like their families and friends.
If you notice that you and your partner are drifting a bit apart or are having more arguments every day, then it is best to see a counsellor as soon as possible. Never think that being in therapy means that you have both fallen out of love. It just means that you are both willing to work on your shortcomings and make your relationship stronger than ever. The worst case scenario is if the relationship really needs to come to an end, you still can go to therapy so you can rebuild the friendship.